ARY Digital’s drama ‘Pinjra; is a heartbreaking tale of child abuse and neglect. It’s a story that offers multiple lessons to parents by showing two contrasting households, one described as a free place for children, where the mother listens and communicates openly, and the other is termed as a cage.
Abhaan, belonging to the latter home suffers from severe anxiety, depression, and distress due to the restricting rules instilled by his parents, Khadija and Javed. In the latest episode, Abhaan takes up pills to rid himself of the pain in his life. Although he is still young, his anxiety and inability to meet his parent’s expectations lead him to consider suicide.
Parenting is a difficult job and everyone isn’t born with the right skills to know exactly how to be a “good” guardian. Therefore, people all around the world should have a guide on how to do better. Luckily, narratives like ‘Pinjra’ have brought out interesting pointers to consider while raising a child. So without further ado, here is a lowdown of the problems one should take heed to.
1. Suffocating boundaries
Having suffocating boundaries creates an extremely toxic environment for people, and definitely, children who are forced to live under rules that don’t let them have any freedom in life. This often creates a place that offers more distress and worries. Like Abhaan, a child can also go to a darker space towards suicidal thoughts and drug addiction. Most boundaries are instilled by parents to garner more control in their household and protect their kids from the perils of society, but sometimes it can go really far and create the opposite effect.
2. Physical abuse has a negative impact
Physical abuse can never have a good outcome: it leaves prominent scars on a child’s mind. Abhaan suffers from anxiety and has a great fear of his parents due to facing physical abuse at the hands of his father. Deep down, he knows that doing anything against his parents would result in another traumatic incident, therefore Abhaan tries his best to be the ideal kid like his brother, but ends up failing each time. What’s worse is that Abhaan would have never opted for suicide or drugs if he had a parent who would listen to him, instead of abusing him.
3. Your child has a voice
Every child has their own likes and dislikes, and their voice counts. Their desires are valid and every parent must understand this before deciding to have a baby. Abhaan is an artistic child, different from all his siblings, and that’s his strong point. Many students aren’t good at academics but have different talents that can be nourished to make a career. For Abhaan it is an art and unfortunately, his parents aren’t able to see that.
4. Respect is a two-way street
Your child won’t respect you if you won’t do the same for them. Javed and Khadija treat their children as an extension of their own desires. They want the “perfect” child, yet ironically aren’t the best parents for them. Therefore, parents need to treat their children as separate humans that should receive respect, love, and trust.
5. Children can have their own dreams and goals
Similar to how children have a voice, they also develop their own interests as they age. Not every child needs to grow up to be a “doctor” or “engineer.” It’s a choice and should be treated as one by their parents too. Sadly, Abhaan’s parents don’t see this and unintentionally make their child suffer.
6. Mental health is real
Children suffer from mental disorders and troubled traumas as well. Like adults, their struggles are valid and in need of attention from a qualified professional. Abhaan deserves to visit counsellors who can guide him to a better outlet for his miseries in life, but again his anxiety and depression are not taken seriously, resulting in a devastating outcome in the end. Parents should regard their child’s mental health with the same importance as their physical health, both are equally responsible for creating a child fit.
